14 June 2021

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FRIENDSHIP vs LEADERSHIP

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I remember years ago listening to a talk when the presenter asked – what is your number one priority in your job ?  I'm pretty sure his answer stopped many brains in their tracks. 

His reply - "to get on with people".

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In friendship we can find ourselves in a situation where we might not agree, may question how another is acting or the perspective they are seeing in a situation or a particular subject.

The language I would use around this is that these are the moments when our separate realities are highlighted and we are privileged to learn more about how that person is seeing the world, thinking their way through.

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In these moments with friends, our job is just to enjoy them. 

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As a leader, in these situations, our role changes.  It is that, plus more.

 

I remember when I was conducting interviews back in my first company for a new program coordinator position. 

 

They would be working fly-in, fly-out to a remote mining location.  A big going concern in the aussie bush with a little townsite included with a few shops, accommodation, business offices.  You get the picture.

 

As part of my interviewing process, at the end I would ask one last question.  “Tell me something about yourself that I wouldn’t know just looking at you”.

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On this occasion he replied, “if I found some money left over I would keep it and not tell you about it”. 

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He then looked at me a bit shocked and said, “I guess I won’t be getting the job, right ?”.  Right. 

He got a ‘thank you for attending letter’.  Not the job.

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A friend can run around and live their life interacting with you.

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A Leader needs to know that the people choosing to work with them are wanting to get to the same destination,with the same integrity and values. 

 

A leader needs to know HOW, and needs to feel comfortable WITH guiding their team – a bit like the geese do in formation as they fly. 

 

It's been observed that geese fly overhead in a ‘V’ formation to give the whole group uplift.. 

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Each moving forward and taking responsibility when needed. Carrying out their role to keep the team moving agile through the sky to their destination.

 

And the ‘honking’ noise ?

 

That’s the leader giving clear direction.  Calling back into place as they tire, and forward to their destination.

 

Maybe it's worth considering prioritising ‘just getting on with people’....and the ‘principle of honk’ in leadership.

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Here's to the wonderment of being a friend and being a leader.

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Cheers, TS.

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